April 25th, 2012: The wind in this part of the world will sometimes knock the damn inspiration right out of me. I was thinking it might be better to just skip a day, rather than write down something too bland, but consistency is key with the program, even when consistency is sometimes merely monotony.
I didn’t weigh today – I think I’m going to wait to weigh until next Wednesday. Why Wednesday? Well, I can’t be perfect, I can’t strive to be perfect, only strive to be better. It’s kind of like starting this program on January 2nd, instead of the 1st. Kind of like my real goal weight is 189 rather than 190. Kind of like my milestones are not even decade numbers.
Monday would be the most logical time to weigh, but I’ll move it a bit to the left of center I suppose. Of the few things I’ve learned the hard way in life, character is one I took to heart. Character is built with color and change and imperfection and desire.
Again I will grind away today, and not miss opportunities to improve myself. Hopefully I have a bit more energy and inspiration. Sometimes Ben gets sleepy, which I think I have been this week. Hopefully I can shake away these cobwebs! Here I go to try.
April 25th, 2020: What happens when the motivation isn’t there? What the fuck do you think? You keep going anyway dumbass!
There are days when my legs are so stiff and sore, and sometimes they feel like rubber, literally like rubber; like the rubber on irrigation boots that have been left out in the sun all day long.
I feel like I’ve got nothing to give some days. Even some weeks. I tell myself that as soon as I’m warmed-up I’ll feel better, but sometimes I still don’t have anything to give to that workout. Day after day I’m sore and tired. Ironically, that’s when the little demon fuckers start telling me that “maybe I’m not eating enough”. NO NO NO NO NO! That is never it! I am eating enough!
I just have to fight through it. I’ve done it before, I’ll do it again. You stop being a pussy and you grind them out. Sometimes it really is just going through the motions. I’ve got to remember that my 100% that day is sometimes only going to be about 70% of yesterday’s effort. I’ve got to remember that on some days, any effort is good effort. On some days, any effort is like hyperspace or overdrive or kicking in the afterburners on an F-15. Sometimes I’ve just got to remember that it’s ok to slow down, I just CAN’T EVER STOP. No Matter What.
